Why Mariska Hargitay Is ‘So Grateful I’m an Older Mom’: ‘When I Was Younger, I Wasn’t as Present’ (Exclusive)

In this week’s issue of PEOPLE, Mariska Hargitay says her “dream role” of Law & Order: SVU’s Olivia Benson came when she was 35. “It felt right on every level,” she recalls of her first script reading.

And that was just one of many happy surprises that would come to her mid-life, including meeting — and marrying — her husband, actor Peter Hermann, becoming a mom at age 42 to their eldest, August, now 17, followed by Amaya and Andrew, both 12, whom she and Peter adopted in 2011.

“I’m so grateful that I’m an older mom. Grateful that I became successful older. I don’t know if I could have handled it when I was younger,” says Hargitay, who is celebrating 25 years on SVU upon its return on Jan. 18, as well as the show’s 25th anniversary.

“When I was younger I wasn’t as present but as I’ve gotten older I’ve started to accept and appreciate,” says Hargitay, who’s turning 60 on Jan. 23. “And now I’m going to savor this moment. I want to share my lessons and where there is pain that I can fix that really inspires me to lighten the load.”

Her cosmic connection to Olivia Benson is further inspiration. “It’s been such a privilege to live with her and have this character as a beacon,” she says. “Olivia is so many things that I’m not and yet she has a clarity and north star to justice, and what seems to be an inexhaustible well of perseverance towards that goal.”

The same could be said for Hargitay, the founder of Joyful Heart. Inspired by the many survivors who told her the show is the reason they reported their assault or abuse, she launched the foundation in 2004 to support and advocate for survivors of sexual assault, domestic violence and child abuse – and make change.

“I lived this perfect feminist story,” she says. “I lived it in many ways on SVU and in my own life. And I’m just so grateful and I want to pay it forward.”