The new Before the 90 Days season has given us some bizarre new cast members, but I have to say that this new guy, Lauren, takes the cake when it comes to being manipulative and repulsive. I’m talking past Big Ed level gross.
When we first met Lauren, he was going on a trip to the Philippines to meet Faith for the first time, who is known as a “ladyboy” (a rough translation from Thai primarily used to describe a transgender woman). They had been talking for 4 months, but you quickly get the impression that Lauren and Faith have completely different plans for their relationship.
Lauren is broke and homeless, cooking shrimp in bathrooms while practicing Filipino food, and he acts more like he wants to marry someone to escape his crappy life. He also wants an open marriage, and his potential partner, Faith, has no idea.
“I don’t think she’s seeing anybody else, but I am,” Lauren says. “I don’t necessarily want us to be an exclusive couple, even after I go to the Philippines because I don’t really believe in monogamy.” So, he is bringing a ring to the Philippines, hoping to corner her into marriage so he can stay there forever, thinking that this is the easy solution to his financial problems and homelessness. And he’s planning all of this when these two haven’t actually met in person yet. He also hasn’t been upfront with Faith about any of it, including the fact that he’s been sleeping around since they’ve been talking and wants to continue doing so.
He’s just hoping that Faith will agree to an open relationship and marriage, and this already feels like it’s going to be such a disaster. Not only does Faith not know his plans, but she wants to take things slow. “This relationship is very important for me because this is my first boyfriend actually.” She seems to have zero clue that Lauren wants to immediately move to the Philippines forever.
“If I moved to the US, I think that Lauren and I will make a successful life together,” she says. Faith is the opposite of Lauren—she seems well-established, has support, and a place to live, so you can’t help but hope that when Lauren arrives with his manipulative plan, their 20 days together ends with him leaving and not leeching onto Faith’s life in the Philippines forever.
When he does finally arrive, his plan seems to include not being upfront about his situation right away. Instead, he doesn’t talk about his crappy life in the US. He’s more focused on trying to rush into seeing if they are physically compatible before he drops all of his baggage. “She seems a little shy physically, but I’m hoping that soon she’ll warm up to me and everything will be great,” Lauren says.
Faith, on the other hand, is focused on getting to know Lauren, going on dates, and enjoying their time together. “This is my first real date with a man that I have feelings for,” she says. But Lauren is just waiting to speed things up, and I guess his sleazy plan includes a written girlfriend test. You already get the impression that Faith seems to be more cautious, like Rose was with Ed. She likes him but is cautious, and that’s a good thing.
As much as Lauren says that he will just go with what Faith wants, he still isn’t being upfront about his intentions. “It’s important to find out sooner rather than later if we are sexually compatible,” Lauren says. That is until he meets Faith’s close friend, Mama Ding. “There’s an idea where I don’t just go home. I just stay here somehow,” Lauren says.
By her face, you can tell that this is the first time Faith has heard this. I had wondered when she heard that Lauren had a small budget if she was starting to get suspicious. “I spent all my savings getting here. Besides the $46 in my wallet, I have a paycheck that should be deposited into my bank account in a few days.”
The main concern with this couple is how much Faith will put up with Lauren’s deceptive behavior. Will she look past all this because he’s her first boyfriend? I hope there’s a line she won’t cross. Faith is already okay with red flags like finances because “love is all that matters.” She’s blinded by her feelings. I hope there are no more secrets, but then I remembered: oh yeah, this guy has more than just that secret.
Now, Lauren has no choice but to mention it. Just to preface this: I’ll be careful with certain words because Lauren shares some disgusting details. The day after the visit with Mama Ding, Lauren gets a text from a friend he was hooking up with two weeks before coming to the Philippines. Reminder: Faith thinks they are monogamous. Meanwhile, Lauren has been sleeping around.
“I went out partying with one of my friends. Turns out, she gave me gonorrhea,” Lauren says. The next episode preview shows him explaining this to Faith. “Why can’t you kiss me?” she asks. “I have gonorrhea,” he replies, grinning. Faith will not find this funny.
